In an interview with the June/July issue of Cookie Magazine, Tori Spelling says that the tough dynamics surrounding her rocky relationship with her mother Candy concerned her when it came to raising her own daughter, Stella.

“My biggest fear in life was having a girl,” says Tori, 35, who appears on the Cookie cover with Stella and her 2-year-old son, Liam. “How was I going to handle a girl?”

“It turns out that Stella is a total mama’s girl,” she says of her 11-month-old tot. “For all my fears, without my even trying, Stella wants her mama. When she is in [husband] Dean’s arms, she lunges for me the way Liam did for him.”

CM | It seems like you’ve made a very nontraditional extended family for yourself.
TS | People assume celebrities have other celebrity friends, but I don’t really. I made some amazing friends when I was 15, and they are truly my family now. Maybe I didn’t get dealt the cards for a close family, but those old friends—Mehran and Jenny and the “gay uncles,” or “guncles,” Scout and Bill—have proven to me that they are my family.

CM l You were also very close to your nanny until her death when you were in your early 30s. Did that make hiring a nanny for your own kids less fraught?
TS | I never understood being competitive with a nanny. If you have someone you trust and who loves your kids, then what an amazing thing you’ve done for them. My kids have Patsy, who is a baby nurse to them and like a mother figure to me. Stella was an unplanned pregnancy, and I think it happened so I could keep Patsy longer. I am very sad Nanny and my dad never got to meet my kids. I have this little bear that was Nanny’s, and I always bring it when I fly. I recently showed it to Liam and explained that the bear is like a grandparent who looks out for us. He grabbed it and kissed it.

CM | Considering the Spelling family business, do you let your kids watch TV?
TS | TV is basically my life, so to be the mom who says, “My kids will never watch,” would be totally hypocritical. We try to strike a balance; it’s a work in progress.

The new season of Tori’s reality series, Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood, premiere on The Oxygen Network this summer.