Over the years, we have made some questionable choices in our lives — many of them surrounding what we thought was cool at the time, or things we thought made us look good. The truth is, we didn’t look good, we looked embarrassing.
Hundreds of years from now, archaeologists are going to find MySpace and Facebook and think to themselves: “What a troubled people they were.” And yes, what a troubled people we all were. Even though these trends were hot back in their prime, all they do now is turn our faces hot with embarrassment. So, feel free to cringe your way down memory lane with this list of the top 10 most regrettable trends.
This one isn’t so far off from present day, having recently inundated the internet with all its weirdness. Is this a collective joke played on us by makeup junkies across the web, or are they serious? We really need to know in time for the Internet Troll Olympics.
Either way, it’s a no from me. Makeup is an art form, and yes, some eyebrows do need maintenance, such as plucking or penciling, that’s all well and good but this… should have never happened. Furthermore, if you have this much extra time on your hands while you’re getting ready, you could’ve had some extra sleep, or a nutritious breakfast, or done literally anything else with your time.
Have you ever been in an emergency situation where you were wearing pants, and needed some way to convert them into capris or shorts quickly? Neither have I, but, that was the glaring issue that convertible pants sought to solve.
These were basically cargo pants that could zip off at different lengths down the legs. They were mostly worn by children, but you could even get them in name brands such as North Face.
These must have seemed really cool, really useful, back then. Now, they just look ridiculous, and the usefulness is lost on me entirely. Fancy a walk on the beach? Just cuff your jeans like the rest of us, and deal with that weird dampness like an adult. Come to think about it; maybe they were onto something with these… but we’re guessing not.
Drop Crotch Pants
There is not one single person on this Earth that looks good wearing these. Sorry, I don’t make the rules.
These pants are truly horrifying. Imagine if humans were actually shaped like that, with our crotches down to our knees? These are reminiscent of other times our legs were clad in failure, like with parachute pants, or culottes. Culottes were bad enough to deserve an entire list for themselves.
This seems like fashion’s answer to the government attempting to ban sagging, instead of wearing your pants around your knees, these followed the same idea without putting you at risk of indecent exposure. I’m all for sticking it to the man, but the designer of these just ended up creating the cousin that harem pants don’t invite to the family reunion.
90’s fashion is experiencing a massive revival currently as “90’s babies” enter adulthood and can now finally afford to make all the terrible fashion choices their parents protected them from when they were children.
Vests are just awful. I can’t imagine the meeting where this idea was first pitched. “How about a jacket… But with no arms?” and the executive slammed his fist on the table and declared, “Yes! That’s what we hired you for!” They’re especially awkward because most people wear them over a t-shirt or a sweatshirt. Denim vests, crocheted vests, or those dreaded puffy vests all fit so awkwardly.
The casual vest is a trend that rears its ugly head every decade or so, and it never gets any better or makes any more sense than it did the last time. If you’re not skiing or existing somewhere that’s cold enough to substantiate such a distasteful garment, just say no.
Who could forget JT and Britney hitting the red carpet decked out in denim from head to toe? Thankfully both of them grew from that mistake, but it seems that not many people followed suit because it took a few more years for double denim to die off. Even now, a few hipsters consider this to be an acceptable style of dress.
It doesn’t work out in anyone’s favor. If you wear denim jeans, with some type of denim shirt or jacket that matches perfectly, you’re going to look like you hit up The Gap in 2001. If you wear two different washes, your outfit is just going to clash. There is no way to execute this look successfully, and for that reason, maybe everyone should just stop trying.
There’s nothing wrong with a cute denim jacket, and definitely nothing wrong with a classic pair of blue jeans, they just don’t belong together on your body.
I could be the odd one out on this one, but overalls are embarrassing to even look at. Regardless of your body shape, these tend to make you look boxy, stocky, and even a tad bit like you’re eight years old.
Granted, this is an American classic, and sometimes it truly does work. A girl in a sailor striped crop top and navy blue overalls? Adorable. Denim overalls, however, just don’t work anymore. A genuine problem with this garment is that people don’t know how to wear it. They’re often bulky, too long, or way too short. There is a sweet spot when you want to hop on this bandwagon, and you need to make sure you find it, or you’ll fall somewhere between Party City’s Sexy Fireman costume and a corn farmer.
Don’t over accessorize, don’t wear plain denim overalls, and you should be totally fine, just don’t tell anyone I approve of this behavior.
Every time I go shopping, and I see someone with a mullet, I think to myself that it just can’t be real. This was one of the hottest styles back in its day, which is fine, as long as we learn from our mistakes.
This is just an awkward cut, with the short hair in the front and the awkward layer of long hair flowing behind it.
The mullet isn’t flattering for people who might have a larger head, or more prominent ears, or any sense at all.
This is just an awkward phase in fashion that would have been best forgotten, but for some reason, it was revamped in the early 2000’s when the MySpace mullet surged in popularity.
Almost every photo that you see on AwkwardFamilyPhotos, or in a quick Google search for ’embarrassing hair’ features this Joe Dirt du jour – and that should say something. Please, for the sake of humanity, let this die.
Your Scene Phase
Speaking of the MySpace mullet, we didn’t forget this one. This was an intense collective experience throughout the early 2000’s, and some teenagers now lament that they missed it. Lime green jeans were so tight you couldn’t breathe, acres of magical hair was simultaneously teased into the stratosphere yet nearly glued flat to cover the eyes, and that music…
This is more of a phase than a trend, but it was so widespread that as an adult, I still shudder when I pass that store in my local shopping mall. This is embarrassing because, as with most trends, there was no logic to any of it. None of our clothes matched, we were all so rAnDoM xD, and we deserved better.
The ever present declaration that “it’s not a phase, mom!” thankfully didn’t ring true, because we all looked like a bunch of cartoon characters, and everyone (gender aside) wore enough makeup to put any modern beauty guru YouTuber to shame. The only benefit this had in society was the surge in profits for Clean & Clear, and I long for the day that all evidence of it is eradicated from the internet.
Between this, and chunky orange highlights, everyone in the 90’s had a weird relationship with store bought hair bleach, and by weird, I mean way too intimate.
In a way it’s great that men decided to start experimenting with hair dye, which was previously kinda “forbidden territory”, but it’s just tragic that it had to be like this. Plenty of terrible hairstyles flourished around this time, like crimping your hair, or “The Rachel.” This one, however, it just takes the cake. It didn’t look like natural highlights at all because they were often stark white and scattered around the wearer’s head in no discernible pattern at all.
Nick Lachey seems to be the first one ever to rock this hair don’t, but several stars like Justin Timberlake, Mark McGrath, and even Jared Leto fell victim as well. Jared Leto’s was probably the worst because he allowed it to grow out the way into a brassy middle-parted mop that made him look more like he belonged on the evening news.
Bell Bottom Jeans
This is probably the oldest one on the list, hailing from the 1970’s and originally popularized by Sonny and Cher. These pants flare from the knee down, sometimes up to 26 inches.
I went to school with a girl who’s mom would sew vintage curtains as bell bottoms on her jeans, and these weren’t even cool when my parents were growing up. These are just awkward. Maybe they give the appearance of a slimmer waist because they’re so wide at the bottom, maybe they make you look taller, I’m not sure why these were so popular, they just make me have indigestion.
Bella Hadid made the grave mistake of stepping out in some bell bottoms recently, seeming to have forgotten that this trend should have been buried long ago. Some articles surfaced in 2014 about these making a comeback, but it never amounted to anything. Here’s to hoping it never ever does.