In other “What the fuck” news of the day, Paula Abdul has been telling snitches in NYC that Simon “That Was Absolutely Dreadful” Cowell was her rock during the 2005 A.I scandal that accused Paula of banging the bejesus out of Corey Clark. You know that cutie biracial dude, with a singing voice that could scratch chalkboard, from Season II. Dollars to doughnuts says he blew somebody’s back out (screwed) to get past the auditions.

“I have to be honest about Simon,” Abdul told a New York publication on Tuesday. “There’s the times when he’s like a big brother – or a lover. He was extremely distraught and protective and supportive of me when that happened.” If there was ever any question that this chick’s sipping more than Coke out of that red cup in front of her during the show, comparing Simon Cowell to a “lover” removes all doubt. What the hell?

Ok-he had your back. We get that. But you compare the guy to a big brother or a dear friend-not a lover. Simon’s concerned about ratings tanking as a result of the male contestants tapping Paula’s ass-allegedly. So sorry Paul, Simon wasn’t being protective of you-he was protective of his job and seven figure paycheck.

For someone whose been in the biz twenty plus years, you’d think P.A would have learned a little bit more about P.R. Slips of tongue like this will get another A.I scandal started faster than she can say “Rum and Coke, please.”