Twenty-one year old two time DUI loser Lindsay Lohan has already devised a defense on the DUI/Drug Possesion charges that could put her behind bars for up to five years. The ‘Freckled Felon’ says, ‘It wasn’t me.’

‘Yes. I am innocent… did not do drugs they’re not mine,’ LiLo told Access Hollywood in an e-mail Tuesday afternoon.

Uh-Huh…..And pigs have wings.

The actress is also defending herself against allegations that she was chasing her assistant Tarin and her mother in a white SUV saying: ‘I was almost hit by my assistant Tarin’s mom.’

‘I appreciate everyone giving me my privacy.’