Paging Ms. NeNe: Professional mouthpiece Michael Lohan can add “Big Papa Pimp” to the list of glowing traits that have made him one of the most hated fathers in Hollywood.

According to tattletales connected to The National Enquirer’s Mike Walker, although Michael isn’t even on speaking terms with his allegedly dope-addicted daughter Lindsay, the born-again Christian is hoping to set the troubled actress up with his not quite divorced bud, Octodad Jon Gosselin.

Tabloid tipsters claim the attention-seeking Michael has hatched a sleazy plot to pimp out his A-list (I’m being generous.) firstborn to 32-year-old Jon, who apparently has a thing for trashy blondes.

Michael “tells Jon he can make the hookup happen, and that they will be the most famous couple in America.”