Hell hath no fury like an eternally-single blonde.

Live From Today’s WTF Files?!, Globe’s resident celebrity snitch Shelby Loosch is reporting that ditzy Jessica Simpson is so distraught over her most recent high-profile romantic casuality, the actress/singer recently hired a “witch,” who she believes will put a curse on Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo.

A witch? Well…we are talking about a girl who gets confused doing the laundry.

“Jessica is normally a really sweet girl, but she still can’t believe Tony callously dumped her right before her 29th birthday last month,” a friend of the jilted beauty reveals in the August 24 issue of Globe. “Now she’s sworn revenge on him.”

After some extensive web-surfing, the star found a woman who she paid an undisclosed sum to put a “hex” on Romo.

“Jessica found a woman in California,” a second insider explains, “The two met at the star’s Beverly Hills home where they lit a candle, burned some incense and performed a couple of incantations.”

Said “spell” will ensure that Jess’ ex not only has a disastrous year on the football field, but an even worse time scoring touchdowns with bustdowns (otherwise known as groupies).

“Some obnoxious fans called me Yoko Romo when we were together, so let’s see how they react when he starts playing poorly and throws a zillions interceptions,” a hurt Jessica pouted to a friend last week. “And if I get my way, Tony’s not going to have any gorgeous girls throwing themselves at him, either!”

With the Cowboys’ first game scheduled for Sept. 13 against the Tampa Bay Buccaneersm Jess is eagerly waiting to see whether or not her most bizarre scheme will make Tony’s life as miserable as their breakup is making hers.