Suzanne Somers used to be HSN’s Empress of Absurdity. She’d go on the air and pretend she honestly believed her overpriced crap wasn’t crap and try to convince you it was a steal — a STEAL — to pay $300 for Chinese-made faux-python pleather pants and show you how a super-gaudy rhinestone necklace can double as a belt or maybe even a tiara because the housewives who watch HSN have so many occasions that call for diamond belts and tiaras.
Then she’d talk about herself a whole bunch and boss a few camerapeople around and call it a day.
When Suzanne left HSN, viewers (and those of us people I don’t know who built entire drinking games around her appearances) openly wept. “Who else could possibly meet that standard of narcissism and self-delusion?” we cried.
And HSN replied … “How about Mariah Carey?”
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The apple doesn’t fall far from the diva! Mariah Carey is still securing the big bucks for the first pictures of her newborn twins — Monroe and Moroccan — but it didn’t stop her from posting this too-cute snap of baby Monroe.
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Social workers paid a visit to Mariah Carey’s Los Angeles home on Thursday, following claims that the singer drank an alcoholic beverage shortly after giving birth to her twins; this after being told about an Old Wives’ Tale concerning the benefits of beer on breastfeeding.
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In Today’s Edition of Ridiculous Celebrity Baby Names….May/December Lovers Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey would like you to send a big “How Do?!” to the newest members of The Carey-Cannon Clan: (Drumroll please…) Moroccan Scott and Monroe Cannon.
Yeah….We’re not talking Apple and Moses or Pilot Inspektor and Coco, but pretty high up there on The WTF? Meter nonetheless.
It’s a good thing they’ll never need “regular” jobs…
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Just in case you haven’t heard, The Carey-Cannon Buns have come out of the oven. Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon celebrated their fourth wedding anniversary Saturday (Has it been that long already?!) by becoming parents to a baby girl and boy today. The stiletto-lovin’ songbird a new mom just in time for Mothers’ Day.
Guess that means we’ve seen our last topless “Nick and Mariah Posin’ Nude with Belly Bump” magazine cover?
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