In another sign of the apocalypse, Paris Hilton is trying desperately to become pregnant. The heiress is so thirsty for attention that she is secretly planning a baby with man of the honor Benji Madden in hopes of reclaiming her crown as tabloid journalism’s favorite little darling.

“She’s jealous of all the attention [best friend] Nicole Richie has been getting and knows she’s fallen off in the tabs lately,” one P.H pal revealed to New York Post. “A baby would put her back in the news.”

Paris has sparked speculation that she may already be pregnant after she was spotted avoiding alcoholic beverages at various events in LA.

“She’s not drinking. It’s the first time I’ve never seen her do that,” a source told E!.