Jokes are like dairy products. They’re only good if you use them in time. If you don’t, you are either left with uncomfortable silence, a sour smell coming out of your fridge or possibly both. Here are 15 catchphrases that should finally be laid to rest once and for all.
Is That Your Final Answer?
Why is Who Wants to be a Millionaire? even still on the air? It’s pretty clear in this economy that people would like to be able to pay their bills, so asking someone if they’d like to be a millionaire sounds pretty stupid. “Is that your final answer?” is a joke that’s so lazy, a guy in a coma could pitch it.
Too Much Junk in the Trunk
At what point did it become acceptable and hilarious to tell someone they have a fat ass? Thanks Shecky, it just so happens I also have diabetes. Wanna make fun of that too?
Houston, we have a problem!
Yes, it’s called unoriginal and lazy writers. Hearing this on a TV show makes you understand why Elvis shot his out. And how is it even funny? Didn’t they say that during the shuttle disasters? Why don’t you make fun of 9/11 why you’re at it? Not enough Holocaust jokes, you had to go sniffing around NASA’s disasters to find new material?
Show me the Money!
Talk about beating a dead Tom Cruise. This phrase became so beaten, so overused, it actually hurts the ears of people saying it now. Even more painful is when someone replaces the word “money” with something else.
That’s What She Said
No, it isn’t. This catchphrase is the equivalent of whipping out your junk and waving it into the face of an unsuspecting socialite. It sounds funny on paper, but in actual practice it’s just pathetic and wrong. Steve Carrel has sufficiently beat this one into the ground.
It’s Very Nice!
Borat is one of those movies that was so intensely funny, it wore itself out in the year it was in the theaters. We get it. He’s a horny, racist immigrant who wants to get laid. We get it. Now stop doing that stupid accent.
Say Hello to my Little Friend!
If only Tony Montana was a real guy. Then he could kill everyone who commits copyright infringement against him. This catchphrase is beaten down worse than Whitney Houston two hours before a Bobby Brown police booking. One Tree Hill has pretty much beaten the entire list down.
Simpsons Did It!
This is a phrase that originated on South Park. Unlike those that continue to copy it, they never repeat themselves. This is probably because they beat it to death during the episode that created it.
Much like South Park, it’s okay for Family Guy to beat this one to death. But anyone on TV that tries to use this, just comes off as desperate to be funny. Here’s a thought: how about having an original thought instead of just proving to people you watch cartoons?
This catchphrase jumped the shark very recently. But let’s face it, using the word “epic” as an adverb was already there and “fail” is sort of like calling some one a “loser” and that’s so 80’s. Let’s put this one to bed before it does any real damage.
Why don’t you have a seat over there?
Hansen meant this catchphrase as a serious part of his show. It’s now a joke. Ha-ha! I’m implying you’re a child molester! Isn’t that hilarious?! No doubt you’ll want to tell all your co-workers so they can reevaluate everything you’ve ever done in the presence of children. Sadly, Chris even Hansen is joking about predators.
This just in…
As if it wasn’t bad enough that news anchors beat this phrase to death in a back alley years ago, now it’s some kind of “joke” following a “witty” sarcastic remark like: “This just in, you suck!” or “This just in, go to Hell!” or “This just in, you’re not funny!”
Looks Like We’re Not in Kansas Anymore
You’re repeating a line from the Wizard of Oz and you think you’re funny? What is wrong with you? That dwarf died, you sick bastard. Plus all those flying monkeys are long dead. You should be ashamed of yourself. Just ashamed.
Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, they rapin’ everybody up in here.
Internet memes are the worst. Any clown with a mouse and too much free time will eventually email this or the hundreds of variations to you. Doesn’t anyone do work in the office anymore? The man was talking about attempted rape! How is that funny?
Technically, it’s not the word that’s worn out its welcome, it’s Charlie Sheen. Thankfully, with the loss of his TV sitcom, it’s just a matter of time before he’s on a VH1 special apologizing to everyone. Maybe the guys at A&E’s Intervention could catch him first.