10 Ridiculous Celebrity Catfights
Poor celebrities. We think it must be hard when you are young, rich and beautiful and all your friends are young, rich and nearly as good-looking as you. Life can be boring, and when it’s not, it’s feverishly competitive. So, in their eternal bid to find themselves accidentally in front of a long lens, who can blame them for engaging in the occasional dog-eat-dog catfight? Always dumb, but never dull, here’s a roundup of some of their most notorious scraps.
10: Kate Moss and Jade Jagger
British supermodel, Kate Moss and jewellery designer, Jade Jagger used to be the best of friends. Yet all that changed when, in the fine tradition of sleeping with your best friend’s boyfriend, Kate slept with Jade’s boyfriend, Dan Macmillan, and Jade found out. Jade dumped Dan, and Dan dated Kate. Jade sent Kate a necklace with the word ‘slag’ encrusted in diamonds.
9: Tori and Candy Spelling
There’s no feud like a family feud, except, that is, a celebrity family feud. Since hit TV producer, Aaron Spelling, died in 2006, his wife, Candy, and daughter, Tori have aired a new episode of their beef every few months. Whether it is about Aaron’s estate, Tori’s wedding, or who was talking to whom in the months leading up to Aaron’s death, their very public personal saga keeps us tuned in and buying their books.
8: Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera
Though they are said to be amicable now, Britney and Christina have had some cast-iron catfights in their time. After fans found out that both singers had been part of The Mickey Mouse Club TV show in their youth, they couldn’t resist but pitch the two against each other. The pop princesses obliged with a feud. Unconfirmed rumours that Christina had dated Justin Timberlake after he split with Britney; Christina’s anger that Britney’s MTV award kiss with Madonna had gained more attention than her own kiss with the Queen of Pop; and Christina’s public criticism of Britney’s virginal image, kept reports of the feud alive. After Britney married K-Fed, Christina allegedly said that she didn’t know who Britney was anymore and that she was acting like trailer trash.
7: Jerry Hall and Janice Dickinson
One of the things we love about celebrities is their refusal to grow up. Jerry Hall and Janice Dickinson first fell out in the seventies when Janice’s former lover, Mick Jagger, moved in with Jerry Hall. Janice, who famously claims to be the world’s first supermodel, once sweetly threatened to shoot her blonde rival, and two decades later, refusing to grow old gracefully, she said in an interview, ‘Jerry hated me, but she can f*** off and die’.
6: Mariah Carey and Eminem
Spat became rap when Eminem wrote about his feud with Mariah Carey in his 2009 song, ‘The Warning’. Their bitter bust-up began in 2001 after they were romantically linked. Though Eminem claims they had an affair, Mariah insists that seeing him ‘for a total of four times’ does not amount to dating. She said he should take up golf or knitting and leave her alone; he threatened to release saved voicemails, and rapped in ‘The Warning’, ‘only reason I dissed you in the first place is because you denied seeing me. Now I’m pissed off’. Beautiful.
5: Tom Cruise and Brooke Shields
When Brooke Shields revealed in her memoir that she had taken Paxil to help her overcome postpartum depression, her one-time friend, Scientology devotee, Tom Cruise, attacked her for taking the psychiatric drug. In response, Brooke said that she wouldn’t take advice from someone who devotes his time to aliens, and mocked the 16-year age gap between Tom and his wife, Katie Holmes. Tom has since apologized, and the pair are friends again.
4: Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan
They may be all smiles here, but in 1994 these two were at the centre of a scandal that rocked the world of figure skating. In a severe case of professional jealousy, Tonya Harding (left) had her ex-husband hit her rival, Nancy Kerrigan, on the knee with a blunt object in the run up to the Winter Olympics. Though Harding escaped a jail sentence, the world was not spared a musical opera based on the event.
3: Lauren Conrad and Heidi Montag
Lauren Conrad and Heidi Montag, of the hit reality MTV show The Hills, first fell out about a boy. When Heidi started dating Spencer Pratt, her best friend did not approve. The girls argued, Heidi moved in with Spencer, and the girls argued some more. When rumours circulated that Lauren had made a sex tape with her ex boyfriend, she blamed Heidi and Spencer for starting the rumour. The couple deny any wrongdoing, and the girls continue to call each other names. The cattiest of catfights.
2: Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie
A sex tape featured large in the breakdown of relations between Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie. In 2005, the former stars of The Simple Life did everything but keep life simple. Paris accused Nicole of screening her ‘secret’ sex tape, remarking in Elle in 2006 that Nicole ‘cannot stand being around me because I get all the attention and people really don’t care about her’. They have since reconciled and successfully appeared in lots of photos.
1: Lindsay Lohan and The World
LiLo pulls no punches. Those at the mercy of her vitriol might not always fight back, but we’re in awe of her dogged pursuit of the catfight. Over the years she has fallen out with Keira Knightley, Sienna Miller (who she called a ‘no talent crackhead’), Scarlett Johansson, Paris Hilton, Courtney Love, as well as the Duff and Simpson sisters. In 2010 she promised her fans some ‘Lohan Mayhem’, kindly delivering it when she punched a man for flirting with her kid sister. Atta girl!