Kinks or fetishes are essentially things that induce sexual arousal but aren’t considered to be “mainstream”. Pretty much everything and anything can inspire a kink for example there’s a whole sexual sub-culture into My Little Pony, that’s right the children’s toy, called Bronies. However, many kinks are far more mainstream than that.
In general kinks are harmless – even if they do seem a little peculiar. Unless a kink involves breaking the law or taking extreme dangerous risks; it can’t hurt to indulge someone’s kink. Though you should never feel obliged to do something that you really don’t want to do either.
With all that in mind, here are today’s 10 most popular sexual kinks:
Not to be confused with trans-sexuality which is where people feel they were born into the wrong gender and want to put that right; transvestism is the act of wearing the clothing of other genders to get off. It’s most commonly done male to female but there are plenty of female to male transvestites too – though they get less press attention. There is nothing about transvestism that makes someone automatically gay and gay folks are transvestites in about the same proportion as they are found in the general population.
Podophilia is an obsession with feet. It is the most common kink which focuses on an area of the body which isn’t the genitals though there are hand, armpit, knee, back, neck, etc. fetishes too. It is commonly expressed in the bedroom through “foot worship” essentially rubbing, stroking, kissing, sucking, etc. feet. Freud said this might be the case because the big toe is kind of penis-like but whatever the case; it’s absolutely harmless. Unless your feet are particularly ticklish of course.
Swinging is the act of partner-swapping though it’s often referred to as “wife swapping” the husbands involved are usually swapped too – otherwise it would be people taking their own wives to bed and that’s not really very kinky. It may also lead to group sex and participation in orgies. It’s definitely not for everybody with some people reporting that taking part damages their self-esteem though many others claim that it does exactly the opposite.
Infantilism is the act of wanting to be like a small child. It’s most commonly known as “adult babies” and essentially the community is full of people who want to be baby in the bedroom. They may wear diapers, want to be fed, groomed, changed, etc. by an adult, use a pacifier or perhaps suck on a baby bottle, they may want to crawl places, etc. It may sound a little creepy but it’s completely harmless and may just be a peculiar expression of a need to be nurtured and cared for.
This one’s a little harder to explain, at least without flinching, otherwise known as a “golden shower” or “watersports” urologania is all about well… urinating. It might sound disgusting but in truth – urine is sterile at least it is when it’s being produced. Some people indulge this fetish on their own and wet themselves either fully clothed or in the bath/shower – whereas others like their partners to do it for them.
Something slightly less “icky” makes up the next item on our list; spanking causes a little pain but it also stimulates the erogenous zones of the buttocks, anus and genitals. It can be part of a deeper desire to submit or be humiliated in the bedroom but there are plenty of people who enjoy being spanked that aren’t into that sort of thing too.
Two sides of the same coin voyeurs like to watch people and exhibitionists like to be watched. More men like to watch than women which you can see from the amount of porn aimed at men. Voyeurism can be a problem when it leads to behavior that is considered anti-social “the Peeping Tom” but in general – it’s harmless. Exhibitionists would be well advised to only expose themselves to willing voyeurs too otherwise they may end up in jail or worse.
There are a large number of people who get off on the feel, taste and smell of materials – they may indulge this by themselves or expect their partner to help out. Popular materials include fishnets, rubber, latex and leather but there’s no limit to the materials people may fetishize so somewhere out there – there’s somebody into Velcro, probably. Some people may also fetishize particular items made from materials – such as stockings, or cat suits, or hot pants, or umm… masks. Of all the fetishes on our list this may be the easiest to bring up on a first date – it really shouldn’t be a huge deal to tell someone you like to see them in pantyhose; should it?
Role-play is simply acting out different scenarios in the bedroom. There are plenty of common role-play themes from women who like to dress as scantily clad French Maids to guys who like to wear police uniforms. There can be a substantial overlap between role-play and BDSM but there doesn’t have to be. A great example of role-play in practice can be found in the TV series Modern Family where the parents, Phil and Clare, like to pretend that he’s a spy and she’s a stranger and then meet in a bar and hook up for a night’s worth of hot, marital passion.
Bondage, domination, sadism and masochism comes in many, many flavors and thankfully most of them are far saner than those made mainstream in the 50 Shades of Grey series of novels. In essence this kink is about consensual power play within the relationship. It may be ultra-mild such as someone liking their significant other to order them to clean the house or it may be extreme and involve dungeons and implements of torture. BDSM is the one kink on this list where there is a potential for harm and it’s important to be very clear about you will and won’t do before getting involved in the scene to any great depth.